By S-Dot for The S-Dot Files
Couples don't usually start out whipping each others *sses, there is a process that leads to this vicious cycle Having shared a similar upbringing as C-Breezy, like a lot of men that watched their moms endure abuse it is typical for many men to develop an aversion to violence. This is attractive to women that have been reared in similar environments. They are drawn to the prospect of being able to wield control over men that can be manipulated and controlled.
Typically a black widow personality type seeks attention and has an idolatrous relationship with themselves. Most will be fixated on hogging the spotlight and will oftentimes fight others for the mirror because they have an "all eyes of me" mindset. These attention-hungry individuals will oftentimes be drawn to others whose star is on the rise to siphon off their "it" factor like energy vampires. They will usually be jealous and respond with rage when they aren't the focal point of the conversation. Most practice 'me-olgoy' the religion of "doing me" and develop a god/goddess complex.
Just think about the characters portrayed by Eddie Murphy and Robin Givens in the movie Boomerang, both of them were black widow personality types. You might've seen them in the clubs screaming about their independent vaginas or boasting about their magic sticks. If this sounds like someone you're considering dating R-U-N!!!
I believe that Rihanna is a young woman that has not fully dealt with the roots of her emotional and physical abuse growing up in a hostile, dysfunctional environment. By her own admission, she has a history of exhibiting aggressive behavior towards men and even admits to expecting to be hit like her mom.
Perhaps you know a man or woman that seems to get off on being abused. If they want you to 'hit it' before you hit it...R-U-N!!! These are the types aroused by make up sex. There have been many eyewitness accounts of her being overly aggressive in trying to curtail Chris' interaction with other people, especially women. Despite being talented and attractive, she like many people suffers from low self-esteem. Beware of women that boast of having their "own house, car and jobs" these are smoke screens for dysfunction oftentimes. Lots of people that are in the public eye suffer from this desire to be seen and heard at all costs. Oftentimes they pay the ultimate price with their lives. If this sounds like you, get help!
People afflicted with personality disorders like BPD and narcissism, etc. show little remorse for their actions. Sadly, many of them will even be elevated as "survivor" emblems without people fully vetting their accounts and examining the roots they sprung from. Because women report their violence and most men suffer in silence the societal response is usually to side with the woman; even in cases where it's been shown she initiated the violence. The stereotypical response when a man is absued by a woman is "what did he do to her?" as if his behavior warrants her abuse. However, we know that the reverse is not tolerated. No matter what a woman does it is socially unacceptable for a man to hit her. Sound like a double standard? Men are told to "restrain her" or "run away." Women are told to "do whatever you have to do." This is a common problem that has led to many men eventually getting incarcerated and losing their lives when they "snap" because they can't take the abuse anymore.
If you are a man experiencing domestic abuse, get help. Don't suffer in silence. You're life could depend on it!
Here are just a few signs she maybe an abuser:
1. Fakes PMS just to excuse her lashing out (monitor and document her cycle)
2. Refers to your “little” friends, etc. condescendingly
3. Calls or texts and flips out when you don’t respond immediately
4. Makes “a real man would…” comments to wound you verbally
Don’t allow people to “play” with you in ways that you are uncomfortable with. Even if a person doesn’t physically hurt you while “playing” they are sowing the seeds to later victimize you.
Did you get “chick slapped”? Does she have a hand and mouth problem? Are you sick and tired of the physical and verbal abuse?
Many abusers will rationalize their violence as being stressed-related. Women abusers hide behind “PMS” and post partum depression (PPD) as the basis for their violent lashing out.
I oftentimes say, “Good head can give you bad credit,” and most folks chuckle at the realness of that statement. However, good head can also kill you as well. Just because she gives you “good” head that doesn’t excuse the reality that she’s a head case that has problems. R-U-N!!!
Got Chick Slapped? Call 800-799-7233 www.ndvh.org (National Domestic Violence Hotline) - It's confidential and it may save your life.
Here's the search warrant issued to the LAPD
The Pattern of Abuse…
According to TMZ.com, “The first occurred in Europe three months before the February 8 attack. Rihanna and Brown got into a verbal dispute and she slapped him. According to the report, he reacted by shoving her into a wall. The second incident occurred approximately 3 weeks prior to the February attack. Brown and Rihanna were in Barbados and were driving a Range Rover. They argued, and Brown got out of the car, and allegedly broke the front driver and passenger side windows.”
“There have been reports on the internet that I didn’t remember what happened that night with Rihanna. I want to try and set things straight.
That 30 seconds of the interview they used of me was taken from a one hour interview during which that same question was asked something like 4 or 5 times — and when you look at the entire interview you will see it is not representative of what I said.
The first four times – or how ever many times it was – I gave the same answer — which was that I didn’t think it was appropriate for me to talk about what happened that night. I said it was not right for me and it really wasn’t fair to Rihanna. The fifth time – or whatever it was – I just misspoke. I was asked, “Do you remember doing it?” and I said, “No.”
Of course I remember what happened. Several times during the interview, my mother said that I came to her right afterwards and told her everything. But it was and still is a blur. And yes, I still can’t believe it happened because it is not me or who I am or is what happened like anything I have ever done before.
As I have said several times previously, I am ashamed of and sorry for what happened that night and I wish I could relive that moment and change things, but I can’t. I take full responsibility for my actions. What I have to do now is to prove to the world that this was an isolated incident and that is not who I am and I intend to do so by my behavior now and in the future.”
Here's Chris Brown doing community service