Thursday, April 1, 2010

You're Not My Wife!!! R-U-N for Your Life

By S-Dot for The S-Dot Files

If she's C-R-A-Z-Y that's not SEXY or COOL.

CASE IN POINT: I know a young man that engaged in sexual roughhousing with his live-in girlfriend who “liked it rough.” He failed to properly discern that she had unresolved sexual trauma. This was foundational for her desire for choking, hitting and abuse during sex which she was socialized to perceive as being pleasurable. This guy was never particularly comfortable with this and mentioned his discomfort she belittled him as being “less than a man” and claimed a “real man would love it.”

Finally, one day when he tried to end their relationship, he found himself in handcuffs.

She waited until after a ‘breakup’ sex episode and then contacted the police to file a report. Imagine that.

On this Friday's show we'll be talking about how to spot the warning signs that she might be more than just a 'drama queen' she maybe C-R-A-Z-Y, that's right she may actually have mental problems that need to be dealt with and resolved before you try to take that relationship to the next-level.

Join us at 10 p.m. - midnight (EST) for "You're Not My Wife" with S-Dot & Friends. Call-in 347.308.8527 to share in this life-saving conversation.

Beware of those who hide behind texting and other forms of alternative communicating. This is usually a tactic used by a black widow to lull you into a false sense of security. They’ll typically text, e-mail or message you constantly to consume a lot of your time. If you are needful of attention, you will misconstrue this as healthy, but it’s actually a ruse. Pay attention!!!

Whenever conversations about man abuse are had there must be an interjection of woman abuse in the conversation, why is that? This is an indicator that the seriousness of this crime is still being framed through the eyes of others. As men, we have to take charge of this dialogue that affects our liberty and quality of life pursuits. It is absolutely appalling to see this passive-aggressive form of sexism that is disguised as activism. Let’s stay focused on the topic at hand.

Asking the right questions will enable you to determine if a potential partner suffers from a Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). Do not get caught up in the physicality of the Law of Distraction.

Listen to the way she describes her past relationships. Does she have baby daddy drama that she plays a significant role in? Perhaps she uses her children as missiles to wound her ex. Beware of those who simply won’t let the relationship end. If you’ve been clear things are not working out and this person continues to try to use sex or other methods to manipulate you into remaining in contact with them – be careful.

Document your contact with them. Save e-mails, texts and IMs on your hard drive. Keep a journal. Make certain to share your concerns with someone else who can later corroborate your testimony if necessary.

Don’t glean without your jeans. That’s right don’t let sex obscure the true view of who you’re dealing with. Until you’ve determined this person brings added-valued beyond the volume of their voice – don’t engage in intimacy.

WARNING SIGN – she watches you sleep and when you awake demands to know what you were thinking about.

If you or someone you know has been 'chick slapped' don't tolerate it. Get out of that relationship. Don't let that person undermine your manhood with threats of violence. A REAL man saves his life, not throws it away. Get help. R-U-N for your life!!!

Got Chick Slapped? Call 800-799-7233 (National Domestic Violence Hotline) - It's confidential and it may save your life.

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